I have to admit that I have a control problem. I like to be in control. I like to control or at least know what the outcome of things will be. For example, one of my greatest fears is flying. I hate flying because when I’m on an airplane, I am completely and utterly out of control. I know that it is completely impossible to always be in control…but when did the sin nature ever make sense? Since turning my life over to the Lord, I’ve been slowly learning how to relinquish control. It’s been a slow go. If I rated my progress, I would say probably about every 3 years, I learn how to release control of a new area in my life. Since becoming a wife and mother, I’m learning how important it is to love without being in control.
I believe that God is teaching me this hard lesson because loved ones will not always do what I think they should do even if what I suggest is the right thing to do. I know that when K becomes a young man, he’s going to make decisions that I may not agree with or that may not even line up with the Word of God. I’m going to have to love him through them all even if he doesn’t do what I think that he should do, when I think he should do it.
One of the ways God is preparing me is through my little brother. He’s 19 years old and determined to join the Air Force after college. I’m completely against it because I don’t want to see my brother’s sweet heart hardened by the military and I don’t want him put in harm’s way if he’s ever deployed. When I asked him why he wanted to join the Air Force, he said that it is the only thing he’s passionate about and he couldn’t just settle for a 9 to 5 in a cubicle even if he was an engineer. He said if he settled for an office job, he’d feel like he wasted his life. Now, how could I argue with that? Even though I don’t like his decision and it still makes me nervous, I have to relinquish control.
When thinking about a scripture for this life lesson, Luke 23:46a comes to mind. “Then Jesus, crying with a loud voice, said, ‘Father, into your hands I commend my spirit’” (NRSV). Jesus trusted God despite a terrible death on the cross. Jesus relinquished his control because he knew that he was in his Father’s hands. This unwavering trust demonstrates to us that we can commit our affairs, our loved ones, our lives to the Father knowing that He will work all things together for the good for us because we love Him and are called according to His purpose (Romans 8:28).
I’m slowly learning how to relinquish control. It’s a process. I have to die daily, but I know God will grow me up and help me get there. What are some of the ways you are learning how to relinquish control?