Partner Post: What Does It Mean to Marry Someone Who Has Children?

When you marry your love, it’s the real start of your life together, even if you’ve been together for a while. But you’ve also each had your own life before getting together, and that means you each have a past. This past might include past relationships and even marriages, which can result in something that’s very much not a thing of the past: children. If you marry someone with children,  it can make things tricky. However, it also means a larger family, and it can be wonderful to come to love the children as much as your partner does. When marrying someone who already has children, there are some relationship issues to consider.

Work Out Your Role

One of the most important things for a step-parent to do is to work out their role in relation to their step-children. Whether they live with you full-time or part-time, or only come to visit occasionally, you need to know where you stand. You should discuss things like discipline and even what the child or children will call you. If there isn’t another parent in the picture, don’t make the mistake of thinking this will be easier. You still won’t automatically be their parent, and they’re probably not looking for a replacement.

Photo by Eveann Jarmon

Resolve Custody Issues

Being married to someone who is still dealing with custody issues from a previous relationship can be tough. It can lead a lot of emotional turmoil, particularly if there is a lot of disagreement over custody arrangements. It’s in everyone’s best interests to try and work out custody issues amicably, although it might be best for you to stay out of it. Help by finding legal support at https://www.bestlawaz.com and offering emotional support too, but try not to meddle too much. Although custody issues can affect you too, it’s important to agree how much you should be involved.

Try to Get Along with the Other Parent

It’s not always possible to get along with your partner’s ex. For one thing, it takes both of you to be willing to try it. However, many women are great friends with the mother of their step-children. It’s worth making an effort for the sake of your step-children, and also simply to make life easier for everyone. It’s easier to do everyday things like arranging visits and deciding what to do for holidays if everyone is able to get along. You don’t all need to be best friends, but being able to work things out together makes life much smoother.

Accepting That You Don’t Come First

One of the hard things to deal with when marrying someone who has children is that you have to accept that you won’t always come first. When you have children, they have to come before anyone else. This can be difficult to understand completely if you don’t have children of your own, but you need to be able to accept that your partner has someone else very important in their life.

There can be challenges if you marry someone with children, but lots of joy too. It means there’s a lot of love to go around.

join the conversation

AlphaOmega Captcha Classica  –  Enter Security Code
     
 

*